A Million Planets and I Crashed on Trash
by Sapphyre Lily
Summary: Iwaizumi didn't really believe in the existence of life on other planets. Then again, he didn't believe that trash could be infinite either.
1. Crash Landing

**Author's note: OMG OMG OMG we did it! My friends and I were discussing the idea of a space AU cos Oikawa is alien trash and well... Things kinda exploded from there. Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Crash Landing**

"Iwaizumi-san, how's the view up there?"

"Same old, same old." Iwaizumi padded over to a window, peering out at the expanse of stars. "Not sure what I'm supposed to be seeing out here, since I'm halfway between Mars and Earth."

The voice on the other end was silent for a heartbeat before speaking tentatively. "Signs of extra-terrestrial life, perhaps?"

"Like that's gonna happen." Iwaizumi snorted. "You know just as well as I do that there's close to nothing out here, Kageyama."

There was a tense silence, and Iwaizumi could practically see the cogs turning in his junior's head as he tried to word his response right. "You'd never know. Maybe your ship would get sucked into a wormhole and spat out millions of light years away–" A harsh screeching from the control panel had Iwaizumi slapping his hands over his ears, and Kageyama's voice cut off abruptly.

Iwaizumi felt himself tilting. As he stumbled forward, his reflexes took over, making him grab hold of a handrail just as the ship turned on its side. His shoulder crashed into the wall painfully, but he didn't feel any sensation of weightlessness. Good. That meant that the anti-gravity system was still working...for now.

"–zumi-san! Iwaizumi-san!" Kageyama's panicked voice could be heard just under the feedback from the speakers, and though he knew it was futile, Iwaizumi tried to respond.

"Don't worry about me! Track my coordinates! I'll deal with this! Just make sure the higher-ups know we finally found something!"

 _Something big and potentially deadly_ , his brain quipped unhelpfully. Iwaizumi immediately quashed the negative thought.

Another burst of static shorted out Kageyama's reply, so Iwaizumi focused on other things – namely trying to hold on as the ship began to flip over and over, almost as if it was in a giant washing machine.

The control panel was still belting out panicked screams when the red emergency lights and the warning siren decided to make their appearance. The final effect was jarring, but mostly irritating, the flashing lights and cacophony of sounds reminiscent of a child throwing a tantrum. The situation definitely didn't look good, but Iwaizumi had been in many drills before, and knew exactly how to handle it.

Moving almost completely by muscle memory, Iwaizumi pulled himself along the bar and leapt for the control panel. He almost missed it, having barely caught its edge by his fingertips, and dragged himself towards it with great effort. Clinging to the panel with one hand, he fumbled along it until he found the override switch. Flipping it quickly, he felt the faint whirr as the ship's steering system switched from automatic to manual. The control panel's screeching cut off, but the emergency lights and siren were still blaring. The communications system was still spluttering as well, and only shut up after its switch received a vicious stab.

Iwaizumi gritted his teeth as he made a grab for the control stick with his free hand. The tumbling motion of the ship combined with the panic of the emergency warning system really wasn't doing much good for his concentration, and he missed several times before finally managing to wrap his fingers around it.

Iwaizumi pulled and pushed at the stick frantically. While the ship seemed to be tilting just barely in the direction he wanted it to, it seemed like he was only helping it to careen even further out of control. A quick analysis of the situation told him that he couldn't do much except to wait it out. Whatever the external force was, it was clearly greater than what his ship's thrusters could overcome. He could only hope that whatever phenomenon he had stumbled upon would be over soon, and would not leave too much damage to the ship.

Moving on autopilot, Iwaizumi grabbed the emergency straps on the pilot's chair, strapping himself in as quickly as he could. Then he ejected the oxygen mask from its compartment and pulled it over his head. That done, he switched the ship back to autopilot mode and leaned back, closing his eyes. He tried his best to tune out the blaring siren and calmed his mind, bracing himself for whatever was to come.

 _At least_ , he thought, as the ship spun faster and wilder, _no one else would have to die if this turns out to be a suicide mission._

x.x.x.x.x

Iwaizumi was certain he passed out a few times, because his waking moments weren't too coherent, and everything had that dream-like haze to it.

A dizzying spin as his ship careened towards a black void.

An impossible shockwave that shuddered through the whole ship, crumpling the walls around him.

The sensation of being cooked alive, the temperature climbing steadily as evidenced by glowing heat waves and his suit sticking to him in the most uncomfortable way.

The burst of fire from the control panel, acrid black smoke wafting towards him.

He had a vague recollection of moving then, fingers too fat and heavy to undo the safety buckles, skin screaming in pain the moment he tried to move. Was this what second degree burns felt like?

The oxygen mask ripped off his face the moment he stood up, the plastic straps weakened by the intense heat. The white floor of the spaceship was hot, noticeable even through the thick soles of his shoes. When Iwaizumi inevitably tripped, the skin on his knees felt like they were sizzling as if they were bacon on a grill.

Iwaizumi thought he might have screamed. He wasn't sure. Did people scream when they dreamt of getting grilled alive?

The pain was intense enough that he began questioning his state of mind. Was it a heat wave or a dream haze that obscured his vision as he stumbled towards the door? And those black spots in his periphery – were those from the lack of oxygen?

The metal handle of the emergency airlock was red-hot, and Iwaizumi actually hesitated. But then it started turning white, and he cursed – or he thought he did – as he grabbed it and yanked with all his might.

A wordless, soundless scream ripped itself from his throat, and he thought his hand had melted, the skin melded to the burning metal. Then the door fell open, pulling him out and throwing him to the ground.

He thought the temperature of his ship was bad, but the ground beneath him was so much worse.

Iwaizumi could feel the waves of heat emanating from the ground, with puffs of hot air leaking through the cracks. He was certain he passed out then, the pain and the heat too much for him to bear. But even in his dream-like state, he felt like he had gotten to his feet and was stumbling forward, eyes barely open, breaths too shallow and quick, and worst of all, with no sensation in any of his limbs. How he was still moving, he couldn't fathom.

Something flashed in his vision just before he tripped and went down, the skin on his face sizzling and blackening as he hit the floor. This time, he was almost certain he didn't get up, because he felt like he had already become a melted puddle of flesh.

x.x.x.x.x

Oikawa was having a bad day.

Nothing was going right that morning, from the moment he woke up and found a very familiar crow and cat pair nestled in his branches. (If the crow in question wasn't so prone to glowing like the sun – and in his facewhen he wasn't yet awake, no less – he might have forgiven him. At least the cat didn't possess that type of annoying ability.)

After chasing off the sleepy duo (and promising himself to have some _words_ with their clan leaders), he had gone to check up on his fellow trees, only to find that at some point in the night, his second and third in command had gone missing. Normally he wouldn't have cared, knowing that they frequently lost track of time while enjoying each other's company. However, this time he was sure they had not returned because he had explicitly forbidden them to go on the mission, and they had gone anyway.

Curse them both.

Turning his face to the smoke-choked sky, he could make out a faint speck in the distance, the odd colouring and wingspan informing him of the person's identity. Yet he was in no mood to talk to his favourite owl, despite knowing that Bokuto could always make him feel better.

Oikawa turned away and strode to the edge of his clan's territory, navigating the piles of trash that obscured the entrance. He had just squeezed his way past the final obstacle when there was a dramatic sound of wings flapping.

Oikawa strode forward, pointedly ignoring the indignant screech that followed after him. A few moments later, there were the sounds of huffing and puffing as Bokuto ran up to his side.

"Tooru!" Bokuto whined. "I was trying to get your attention for important reasons, you know!"

"I'm not in the mood for anything." Oikawa managed to dull the edge in his voice, but just barely. Bokuto gave him a knowing look.

"Mattsun and Makki are okay."

"You saw them?" Oikawa didn't temper his voice this time, allowing both relief and anger to seep into it.

"Yup! They just left the palace. Found the best loot too. You gotta give me some when they get back."

"Oh?" Oikawa was curious. What could they have found that even wishy-washy Bokuto Koutarou coveted it? "What did your team find? I'm not trading it for nothing."

Bokuto laughed out loud, jovially slapping the brunet on the back. "That's the Tooru I know and love! Always so cautious with what's yours! But really," he continued, "You know my owls don't have anything, we can't take spoils from the pala–"

A burning streak in the corner of his eye made Oikawa look up, and Bokuto whistled beside him as their eyes tracked the falling object. "Wow. That takes 'burning ships' to a new level."

"A ship?" Oikawa perked up immediately, even as his eyes continued to follow the trajectory of the flying object.

"Oh yeah, I forgot your eyes aren't as powerful as mine. Looks like a rocket or something." Bokuto squinted at the ship, now a speck in the distance. "A bit like those old junk ships that the Nohebi collect."

Oikawa felt a frisson of excitement. "Kou-chan, what if it has aliens on it?" He grabbed Bokuto's hand and tugged him in the direction that they saw the ship fall. "This is our chance to see aliens up close!"

"Oi, oi!" Bokuto laughed, even as he let himself be dragged. "I'll follow you, bro. Don't blackmail me, my heart can't take it."

"Bah. The only one for you is Akaashi-kun, the whole world knows that."

"So true! Hey, hey, want me to fly ahead and spot it for you?"

"If you would." Oikawa was practically bouncing with excitement. Bokuto grinned, then shoved his face into Oikawa's. The brunet wrinkled his nose as he backed up. "What?"

Bokuto wiggled his eyebrows. "I need my oxygen boost. I flew here from the palace, you know."

"Argh, you are such a _pain_."

"At least you know it means nothing." Bokuto pointed out. "I would never betray Akaashi."

"Fine, fine. Aliens are worth it." Oikawa grumbled, but pulled Bokuto's chin towards him anyway. Sucking in a deep breath, Oikawa kissed Bokuto firmly, exhaling as much air as he could into the other's mouth.

The brunet then pulled away and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Okay, now go! Aliens await!"

Bokuto looked at him dreamily and gave him a blissed-out smile. "Okay. Man, oxygen tastes so _good_."

"Shut up and go, you brainless owl." Oikawa pushed Bokuto playfully, and the other grinned as he ran off, his form rippling into that of a horned owl just as he launched himself into the air.

Oikawa followed his flying form on foot, his excitement giving him greater speed. He climbed mountains of trash easily, jumping from one unsteady foothold to another as he tried to keep up with the owl. Even the dimness caused by the mid-morning smog couldn't hold him back, and before long, proof of his exertion appeared as black rivulets of sweat streaking his skin.

It seemed like forever before Bokuto stopped, circling an unusually bright area almost hesitantly before diving down. Oikawa was about to follow when a distressed screech stopped him, and a fully human Bokuto stumbled over the incline of garbage.

Bokuto grabbed Oikawa's shoulders when they reached each other. "Tooru, don't go down there. The ship is on fire, and it smells worse than the smog."

"Are there any survivors?" Oikawa tried to peer around his friend, but Bokuto held him firmly in place.

"I don't know, bro. It'd be kinder to let them die if there was anyone on board. That fire is no joke."

"Let me go, Fuku-chan! I need to know!" Oikawa tore himself from his grasp, tripping over the uneven ground as he flew down the trash heap. He had felt the heat from the flames when he was at the top of the mountain, and descending only confirmed that he was walking into a blazing inferno.

Oikawa stumbled back as a wave of hot air washed over him, bringing one arm up to shield his face from the heat. A light of understanding flicked on in his head, connecting the heat and the brightness to an infamous place. He could hear Bokuto in the distance, "Tooru, I told you not to go in there! Are you crazy? I thought you knew that's the Fire Crater! You'll burn!"

"I've got thick skin, I'll survive!" Oikawa called back as he surveyed the Crater. There was no time to regret his decision.

The white spaceship was on the far end, red and orange flames licking at it greedily. Little fires poked up from the garbage surrounding him, their combined heat pressing in on him like a heavy blanket. The brunet shuddered as he imagined them eating away at his body. Burning branches were no joke, and he definitely didn't want to explore the concept of his flesh burning. Maybe Bokuto was right, and he should give up on the notion of saving any aliens from the ship. The heat was already affecting him, drying his sweat and leaving him hot and itchy.

Just then, a wall burst out from the side of the ship, flying across the crater and dragging a humanoid figure along with it. The alien fell off the piece of wall and rolled onto the ground, coming up on hands and knees. Oikawa watched in fascination and horror as the alien stumbled to its feet, taking several steps forward before falling facedown. Though there was no wind, Oikawa could smell its burning flesh, the familiar stench shocking him from his reverie.

In a split second decision, Oikawa jumped to the bottom of the crater, rushing towards the fallen alien. He grabbed hold of the suit the alien was wearing and flipped it face up before beginning to drag it away. The heat emanating from the floor of the crater was not something to be scoffed at. Even though he was in human form, Oikawa could feel the hairs on his arms getting singed by the heat. It was all he could do to suppress his natural instinct to run as far as he could from that place. Instead, he focused on his straining muscles and his pity for the alien, who had fallen on its face on the burning ground.

The sliding and crashing of objects behind him told him that Bokuto had followed him down, but instead of stopping to help, Fukurodani's leader ran past him. Oikawa continued struggling with the alien on his own, inwardly cursing Bokuto and wondering what he was up to. Some moments later, a pair of toned arms slid into his vision, pushing him aside.

"There's no one else on the spaceship. Take the legs. I've got the shoulders." Bokuto grunted as he hoisted the alien up by its armpits, and Oikawa quickly complied, a wave of relief washing over him. The adrenaline rush had blocked his initial worry, and he hadn't even stopped to wonder if there was anyone else on the ship. He would have to thank his friend properly after they made it out.

The alien wobbled in their grip, the uneven weight distribution making them move awkwardly. Oikawa hadn't expected the alien to be as large as them, and definitely hadn't expected to find a being as heavy as the one currently helping him to carry its dead weight. They slipped and stumbled up the trash heap while carefully avoiding the spontaneous fires, cursing colourfully as they backed into cooler air.

At the lip of the Crater, they lowered the alien to the ground, panting in place for several minutes. Now that he was out of the Fire Crater, Oikawa could feel the distinct difference in temperature, and he involuntarily shuddered with relief.

After he caught his breath, Oikawa peeked at the alien's blackened face curiously, trying to see past the layer of dirt. He shook his head mournfully. "I can't even tell what it looks like."

"Looks like us actually." Bokuto observed, suppressing a cough as he poked at the suit, palpated its arm and patted down its body. "Yeah. Definitely human-ish. Oooh, this means there are other humans on other planets!"

"Yeah." Oikawa was excited at the prospect, he really was. But the black and blistering skin on the alien's face combined with the state of its charred suit were not reassuring signs of its chances of survival. If one of their own had gotten this extent of injury, they would take forever to heal without salves stolen from the Nohebi.

Tuning out Bokuto's excited rambling, Oikawa continued watching the alien's face for signs of breathing. He couldn't see any, and that worried him. There was suddenly a patch of pink on the side of the alien's face, and he touched a finger to it tentatively. His finger came away wet, and the sensors in his fingers told him that it was saltwater.

 _Sweat, maybe?_

Squinting at the blackened mass that was the alien's face, Oikawa noticed more sweat starting to appear. He touched a hand to the exposed skin of its neck and immediately flinched away from the heat.

 _It's burning up. Do aliens get fevers like we do? Or is it heatstroke?_

Oikawa felt almost afraid as he leaned down and put his head to its chest, where he thought its heart would be. He couldn't hear any heartbeat, but there was the faintest rise and fall of the alien's torso. Following a whim, he placed his fingers above what seemed to be the alien's mouth, feeling for its shallow breathing, and his heart contracted.

 _I was right. It's not breathing._

"Fuku-chan. I need you to get Kuroo."

Bokuto snapped to attention at the mention of his best buddy, his mindless rambling falling away. He coughed briefly before saying, "Oxygen boost first, bro. I'll fly faster that way. Anyone else I should get?"

"Refreshing-kun would be good. The alien isn't breathing. Maybe Karasuno's retrieval squad. We definitely can't carry him on our own."

Bokuto shook his head. "They'll all be tired after last night's mission, but I'll try. Hinata should have the energy."

"Whatever. Just get someone, please." Oikawa pulled Bokuto in and gave him three deep breaths. "I'll try to see if Alien-kun here takes oxygen too."

"'Kun', huh? You think it's a guy?" Bokuto's voice was teasing, slightly delirious from the oxygen. The tiniest cough escaped him, but Oikawa was so distracted, he paid it no mind.

"Could be, by the face. Hurry up and go, Kou-chan! Alien-kun could be dying!" _Is dying._

"Alright, alright!" Bokuto touched Oikawa on the shoulder lightly as he turned away. "Keep cool."

The sound of powerful wings beating informed Oikawa that Bokuto had left, so he began his work. He hadn't taken to the healing arts like Karasuno's Refreshing-kun had, but he knew the basics. Even better than that, making sure someone else continued breathing was kind of his speciality.

Gingerly touching the alien's burnt face, Oikawa wiped away the soot and grime, its sweat causing the dirt to smudge. Its charred skin was dry and broken in many places, but its face bore similar features to his own.

 _Eyes, nose, mouth, ears... We're practically the same. And here I thought aliens were little green men._

Curiosity satisfied by his observation, Oikawa steeled himself before pinching the alien's nose shut and pressing his mouth to charred lips, exhaling deeply. He could see the alien's chest rise, and when he pulled away, the alien seemed to be breathing a little better.

Oikawa punched the air in triumph. _Alien-kun can take oxygen!_

Appeased by his breakthrough, Oikawa took to his new task of breathing for the alien, even though he already couldn't stand the taste of ash and soot.

 _Pinch, attach, exhale. Pinch, attach, exhale._

 _Repeat._

It took 148 breaths before he heard the flapping of wings and Bokuto's screech of greeting. 19 more before Kuroo appeared, Karasuno's retrieval squad in tow. Three before the alien was on the stretcher.

There were no more breaths for the alien after that, not when they were moving. Thankfully, by then the alien seemed to be able to breathe somewhat on his own. Oikawa was getting really sick of the taste of ash and burnt flesh.

Turning away, Oikawa gave Bokuto five breaths in thanks before they began stumbling back towards Karasuno. His lips were chapped and dry, and the taste of charred meat would follow him to his deathbed, yet he couldn't help but desperately hope that his newfound obsession would survive.

x.x.x.x.x

Kuroo strode confidently into Karasuno's camp, calling loudly for its leader. Daichi poked his head out of his tent, eyebrows furrowed with sleep and slight annoyance. "Don't yell, Kuroo. Most of us are still sleeping after last night's mission."

"No time, Sawamura. Prep your surgical room. Oikawa found an alien, and it's in bad shape." Kuroo walked back towards the entrance, shouting over his shoulder, "Suga wants the usual equipment, as well as Tsukki and Yamaguchi."

Daichi frowned at Nekoma's leader, but he didn't protest. Sometimes the other overstepped his boundaries in other clans' territories – especially Daichi's – but medical emergencies were one sort of situation he could forgive Kuroo's obnoxiousness for. Stepping out of his tent with more alertness, he went to wake Tsukishima and Yamaguchi. If Suga needed both of them for a healing, then things were definitely in a bad way.

Yamaguchi had just finished laying out the surgical instruments and healing salves when the chatter of their retrieval squad reached his ears. He started towards the curtain, but Tsukishima beat him to it, pulling the fabric aside as their tired and sweaty team burst in. The retrieval squad quickly rearranged themselves such that Asahi and Kuroo were holding the stretcher, allowing Tanaka and Ennoshita to transfer the alien to the surgical table. Hinata stepped out from behind them to hover nervously near the table, his light flickering with his anxiety. Suga brought up the rear, calling out numbers and names of items as he entered the room, and Yamaguchi lunged for paper to take them down.

"Tsukishima, get the cloth scissors and cut that suit off him. Save the material, we can look at it later. Yamaguchi, I need water and clean bandages. Get the IV transfusion kit as well, he's losing too much fluid. Body incompatibilities don't matter right now, he's just another patient. Hinata, stand beside me and keep calm. I need your light. Someone get Oikawa in here, we need him for oxygen. Make sure Bokuto or another owl is always stationed outside, we need someone to take messages and get supplies."

Everybody set about to their tasks, the urgency in Suga's voice not escaping them. Kuroo watched from the door as they cut the blackened suit off the alien, loud gasps echoing as they took in the extent of the damage.

The alien's body was covered in blisters, some of them bubbling with blood. There were more patches of blackened skin than not, and some patches had white edges where the suit had melted and fused to his skin. Suga shook his head once before calling for rags to wipe away the blood, placing damp cloths over the reddened skin.

Kuroo realised that Suga was calling his name. "Kuroo, I need you to get Kenma, please. I have some numbers, but I need to be sure of the extent of the damage."

"Sure. Be right back." Kuroo strode out of the tent, smirking at Bokuto as he exited. "Hey, Bokuto!"

"Hey hey hey, Kuroo!" They shared a lively fist bump, completely forgetting about the dire situation for a moment. Bokuto covered up his cough with a question, "Need me to take a message?"

"Nah. I need to get Kenma, and Nekoma's just round the corner. Save your energy, bro."

"Thanks bro." Bokuto grinned widely, swallowing another cough. "Morphing and flying around so many times in one day is exhausting. Wait, don't go." Bokuto grabbed his sleeve. "How's the alien?"

Kuroo shook his head, torn between leaving to find Kenma and staying to chat with his friend. It seemed like there was something off about him, but he couldn't yet pinpoint what it was. "Looks real bad. I don't think even Suga could save him."

"Well, shit. Tooru's gonna be upset."

"No kidding."

They stayed like that for a minute before Kuroo sighed and walked away. "Well, I'd better get Kenma. Maybe he'll have a better idea of how to save the alien."

"Keep cool." Bokuto called, suppressing another cough. "Kenma's sure to have an idea."

x.x.x.x.x

"He's going to die."

"Ken-chan!" Oikawa wailed. "Couldn't you say it less harshly?"

"No." Kenma's eyes drifted off to the side. "I can't help what I see. It would take a miracle to save your alien."

Oikawa whimpered pathetically.

"Suga-san, is there really nothing we can do?" Hinata asked in a small voice.

Suga shook his head. "My salves could heal the burns, but he wouldn't last long even if he was healed. His body isn't adapted for living on our planet."

As if to emphasise his point, the alien wheezed breathlessly. Oikawa immediately bent over to give him a lungful of air.

Suga continued explaining softly, "He can barely breathe on his own, so I suspect he needs more oxygen than we do. Do you see how badly he's sweating, even though we're indoors? His body isn't meant to be in an atmosphere as hot as ours. He'd heal better if we could get him somewhere at least twenty degrees cooler."

Hinata uttered a soft "Oh", his usually radiant light dimming with his mood. Across them, Oikawa straightened up, his eyes shiny with angry tears. "Isn't there any way to save him, then? Any way to make him suited to living on this planet? I'd send him back where he came from, but his ship is destroyed. He _needs_ to stay with us."

"If he wasn't injured, he could have had a chance at adapting to our planet on his own. It would be slow, but it could happen. He looks healthy in general, and I think he's probably one of those survivor types." Suga sighed sadly. "Oikawa, I understand what you're asking for, but it is impossible. If I knew of such an instant cure, I would have given it to him already. However, if such a thing existed, only the Nohebi would have it."

"Damn it." Oikawa punched the table, sensing the truth in Suga's words. His throbbing fingers curled in the cloth covering the alien, and frustrated tears burned in his eyes.

 _Why? The first alien I've ever found, and he's doomed to die before he can wake up and tell me all about his planet?_

 _It's not fair! Why does this always happen to me?_

 _Please, someone, anyone, let him survive. I'll do anything. Don't let him die. Not yet._

"Erm, excuse me..." All eyes turned to Yamaguchi, who shrank under their gazes. He gulped once, then cleared his throat noisily, but his voice still came out as a squeak. "We raided the palace yesterday."

"I am very aware of that fact. What is your point, Freckles-kun?" Oikawa's voice was sharp, too distressed to mask his brutal tone.

Yamaguchi paled at the unspoken challenge, but squared his shoulders bravely. "I got a look at the spoils, and I know which ones each clan took. It was a good haul yesterday, so each clan kept what they found on the raid. If I'm not wrong, Aoba Jousai found the most valuable items.

"What I'm saying is, I think Matsukawa-san and Hanamaki-san may have found something that might help the alien."


	2. Human Trash

**Author's note: Whew, after 2 weeks I finally managed to get this chapter edited and edited and edited again, and now I'm happy with it haha. Questions will be answered and more questions will be raised~ Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

 **Chapter 2**

"What?" Oikawa stared at him blankly. "Mattsun and Makki found what?"

"I'm not sure, but Matsukawa-san took something from the experimental labs. I heard him say that it was supposed to make living on our planet easier or something?" Yamaguchi turned to his best friend with pleading eyes. "Tsukki, help."

Tsukishima sighed heavily, clearly irritated at being dragged into the conversation. "Matsukawa-san said he found an adaptation serum. Or at least, that's what the bottles were labelled as."

"What is it supposed to do?" Suga asked, curiosity shining from his eyes.

Tsukishima shook his head. "I don't know. It was Seijou's spoils, and they would not trade it for anything."

All eyes turned to Oikawa, unasked questions hanging heavily in the air. He threw his hands up in exasperation. "I didn't allow them to go! And I haven't seen them yet." Oikawa lowered his eyes, pursing his lips. "Maybe we should get them to bring it over. It's worth a try."

Suga nodded. "Hinata, go tell Bokuto to bring Hanamaki and Matsukawa here. Tell them to bring last night's spoils as well, on Oikawa's orders."

"Tell them that if they don't come as quickly as possible, they can camp in the Fire Crater for the next week." Oikawa added. He looked both irritated and sulky. "That'll teach them to disobey me."

Hinata looked like he was trying not to laugh as he left the tent.

x.x.x.x.x

Matsukawa and Hanamaki walked into the tent thirty-five transfused breaths later, carrying a small box between them.

"Yo, Oikawa."

"Don't 'Yo, Oikawa' me! You left against orders!" Oikawa protested loudly. A second later he had thrown his arms over their shoulders in a group hug, a loud sob escaping him.

The duo patted his back awkwardly, allowing him to cry for a few breaths before pushing him away. "Okay boss, enough waterworks. What's the emergency?"

"And why does it involve last night's spoils?" Hanamaki added.

Oikawa wiped his eyes, then pointed over his shoulder at the badly burnt alien. "Tsukishima said you guys found something that could help him."

The duo turned to face the table, eyes widening in horror. "Whoa, who is that?"

"Oikawa and Bokuto found this alien after he crashed in the Fire Crater earlier today." Suga spoke up, eyebrows furrowing as he skimmed a hand along the alien's shoulder, assessing his condition. "He suffered third degree burns to forty percent of his body, and the remaining sixty percent is covered in second degree burns."

"Shit, how is he still alive?" Hanamaki exclaimed. "Wait, that's an alien?!"

"Yes, it is. The similarities are amazing, aren't they?" Suga looked almost reverent. "Oikawa rescued him right after he escaped from his burning ship, and helped him breathe until we could bring him back here. But I'm afraid he won't last very long, even if I healed his burns. That's where you two come in."

Matsukawa and Hanamaki exchanged a grim look. "How can we help?"

"Tsukishima and Yamaguchi said that your spoils from last night's mission was some sort of adaptation serum?"

"Well..." The duo glanced awkwardly at each other. "To be honest, we're not sure what it does. Even the Nohebi don't know."

"What?"

"Take a look for yourself." Matsukawa pushed the box into Suga's arms. "When we took it, all we wanted to do was slow down the Nohebi's experimenting. This was the most tightly guarded one, so we figured it was pretty important."

"You broke through the Nohebi's tightest security?" Kenma looked impressed.

Matsukawa shrugged. "Hanamaki's a great hacker."

"Kozume, take a look at this." Suga handed him a bottle from the box, then picked one up himself. "Can you tell what its components are?"

Kenma peered at the test tube, tilting it to see the liquid better. "It's too dark in here. I need to open it in order to check properly." He glanced over at Oikawa. "Can I?"

Oikawa waved airily. "Go ahead."

As Kenma uncorked the bottle and shuffled out, Suga looked around. "Where _did_ Hinata go? It really is too dark in here."

Tsukishima sounded almost bored as he answered. "He's with Kuroo-san, and both of them are arguing with Bokuto-san. Can't you hear them?"

Everyone quieted at his statement, and words of the argument taking place outside the tent became clear to them.

"But Bokuto-san, you're not okay! Let Suga-san look at you, please!"

"Chibi-chan is right, Bokuto. Listen to him for once."

"Oi!"

"I'm – cough – fine. Don't bother Suga, he's got a – cough – patient. It's just a – cough – tickle, it'll go – cough – away soon."

"Bokuto-san–"

"Hinata has a point." Suga lifted the tent flap just enough for his accusing grin to beam through the gap. "That cough sounds like something that needs to be looked at."

Bokuto looked both chagrined and indignant. "I said I'm fine." A small cough punctuated the end of his sentence, causing Suga to raise his eyebrows.

"No, you're definitely not. Tsukishima, Kuroo, seize him."

"Hey, hey, wait–!" Bokuto tried to run, but was quickly captured when the two grabbed him under his arms and hauled him into the tent. They dropped him on a chair and clamped down on his shoulders to hold him still as Suga approached him.

Bokuto looked around pleadingly for an ally. "Hinata, Tooru, get me out of here–!" He tilted his head back to glare weakly at Kuroo and Tsukishima. "You traitors, let me go."

Tsukishima's response to that was a sardonic grin and a tightening of his grip.

"Sorry, Bokuto, but you need to let me check. That cough sounds dangerous." Suga knelt and put a hand on his chest.

"Yeah, bro. What did you do? You weren't coughing last night."

"Nothing!" Bokuto whimpered as he tried to wriggle away from Suga's healing fingers. "I didn't do anything different. I'm _fine_. Just fine. I don't need medicine, and I definitely don't need healing. Someone save me..."

"Bokuto-san?"

Bokuto peeped in surprise, but no one else reacted to the new addition. He struggled with a little more strength while crying out to his would-be saviour. "Akaashi–! Help me!"

Akaashi poked his head into the tent, eyes darting about until they landed on his captain. His voice was cool and unaffected, even as he took in Bokuto's predicament. "Ah, Bokuto-san. There you are. The Nohebi were wondering where you went to. They wanted someone to go check out that crashed spaceship."

"You can report back to the palace, Akaashi-kun. We already did that." Oikawa spoke up, his eyes still fixed on Bokuto.

Akaashi looked surprised as he spotted the other man. "Oh. Oikawa-san. Nice to see you. Did you find anythi–" His eyes widened as they took in the figure on the surgical table. "Is that guy breathing?"

"Oh shit." Oikawa cursed, and ran back to the alien's side to give him a breath.

Akaashi stood dumbfounded as he looked between Oikawa reviving the motionless figure and Bokuto being forcibly restrained while Suga examined him. Everyone else present was watching the proceedings with calm amusement. "Can someone tell me what is going on? Why is pain-in-the-ass Kuroo-san helping to restrain Bokuto-san?"

"Oi." Kuroo protested.

"Akaashi, save me!" Bokuto yelled.

Akaashi glanced over. The older man looked so miserable that he had to ask. "What have you done this time, Bokuto-san?"

"Nothing!" Bokuto protested, his eyes wide and innocent. "I saved Tooru's alien and I made sure that there was no one left on the burning spaceship. Why does nobody give me any credit?"

"You walked into the spaceship while it was burning?" Akaashi looked horrified. Beside him, understanding dawned on Kuroo's face. "Bokuto-san, you could have died!"

"But I didn't! And I'm perfectly fi–" Bokuto dissolved into hacking coughs, and Suga leapt out of the way just in time.

Akaashi's frown was pure disapproval, but Bokuto still shot him a weak grin.

Suga went over to the table and wordlessly picked up a tincture, casually pressing it into Akaashi's hand with an unimpressed look at Bokuto. A few whispered instructions later, he dusted his hands off and walked out of the infirmary to look for Kenma, ignoring the echo of Bokuto's betrayed screeching.

Suga found Kenma underneath an overhang of garbage, rubbing something between his fingers. Suga suspected it was the serum. His thoughts were confirmed when the smaller man said, "I can't tell what the individual components are."

Suga's shoulders slumped almost imperceptibly. "Oh. That's too bad."

Kenma shook his head in response. "I think Matsukawa is right. This serum encourages a person's body to adapt to the environment they are in. The fingers on my right hand feel more sensitive than those on my left already."

"Oh." Suga perked up. "That sounds good."

"We should wait a while before giving it to the alien," Kenma said. Suga flushed, knowing that he had seen through his intentions. The blond continued, "In case there are side effects. If I don't get any allergic reactions in an hour, we could give it to the alien. We seem to have similar body compositions, so it shouldn't have that many detrimental effects."

"Thank you, Kozume. Oikawa will be happy to hear that."

"Don't thank me yet." Kenma's gaze was fixated on a point near Karasuno's edge when he suddenly cocked his head. "We should go back. Shouyou sounds distressed." His eyebrows furrowed. "Kuroo sounds like he's enjoying himself."

Suga shot to his feet. "Ah, I forgot I left them unattended! Kozume, come with me please. Bokuto needs some looking at. I'd like your opinion to ensure that I diagnosed him right."

Kenma nodded slowly. "Bokuto sounds extremely distressed. Akaashi is not as calming a presence as he usually is."

"Well," Suga chuckled nervously. "That is probably because I gave Akaashi-kun some of the antidote to feed to Bokuto. He seems to have inhaled quite a bit of plastic fumes but is refusing medical aid. I need the exact percentage of the damage in order to give him the right dosage."

Kenma bobbed his head in understanding and gestured for Suga to go ahead of him. As they started to head back, he heard Kenma snort, as if the situation had finally sunk in. The blond tried but failed to hide his soft laughs behind his hand, and soon, Suga found himself joining in. It _was_ pretty hilarious how beefy Bokuto was afraid of healers and their small vials of medicine.

It took a full minute of wheezing before Kenma managed to choke out, "Bokuto must feel so betrayed. Serves him right."

x.x.x.x.x

Iwaizumi was burning.

Every inch of his skin felt like it was on fire, his nerve endings screaming for help. He couldn't see the cause of his misery, and to top it off, his muscles were locked in place, paralysing him.

He wanted to scream in frustration, but his mouth was clamped shut as well. To add on to that, his vision was completely black. No matter how he tried, his eyelids remained glued together and he couldn't see a thing. The darkness made it impossible to distinguish between dreams and reality, between wakefulness and sleep. Memories and hallucinations were thrown together in a disturbing slideshow of images, a nightmare that he couldn't wake up from.

The fire licking across his skin was intolerable, a slow but intense consumption that gave him the image of being roasted on a spit. It assaulted him from all directions, so much so that he couldn't pinpoint its exact source no matter how he tried. It felt even worse than the metal handle of his burning ship, or the sizzling ground that he had fallen onto.

...or were those delusions that he had dreamt up?

Iwaizumi was almost certain that he was asleep, because he only remembered fragments of things. Sometimes he thought he heard a soft voice cooing to him, and during those times, the burning of his skin would lessen ever so slightly. Sometimes he heard hushed voices, their tones worried and anxious. Most times, all he remembered was warm air filling his mouth and lungs, every second in between those breaths punctuated by the tightness of his oxygen-deprived chest.

The only thing he _was_ certain of was that he couldn't see, and that his limbs were locked into place. It was something that frustrated him to no end, especially when he inconsciently tried to open his eyes or lift his arm and felt no response from his body. The feeling was akin to his envisiagement of a spirit untethered from the physical plane, drifting along in an empty void. It was dreary at best and dispiriting at worst, and in his delirious state, Iwaizumi often wished he had died instead.

It was a very long time before Iwaizumi was sane enough to notice things in his black solitude.

One, the fire on his skin was diminishing, albeit slowly. He couldn't pick apart the difference, or pinpoint when it had begun, but in a moment of clarity, he felt the cool whisper of cloth over his skin, its dampness soothing. After that time, he could feel the cold touch of items more acutely, be it the roughness of a palm or the scratchiness of fabric. Sometimes, a touch warmer than his overheated skin would skim over his body, and though uncomfortable, he always felt distinctively better after it left. When he started counting to distract himself from the remnants of pain, he noticed that the frequency of the placement of cooling cloths seemed to be decreasing. He supposed it was a sign that he was getting better.

Two, he was sure the voice he had been hearing was speaking his language. (It was either that or he learnt an alien language in his unconscious state. Both ideas were admittedly quite crazy.) He was certain that the voice belonged to a male, or whatever the equivalent of a male was on an alien planet. The voice was deep when it was worried, high pitched and teasing when speaking to others, and deeply comforting in his isolation. It was not the only voice he heard, but it certainly was the one that spoke to him the most. There was no end to its complaining about its day or the people it had to deal with, its softly crooned lullabies and gentle reassurances, or (his favourite) its stories of its childhood and how it had gotten into endless trouble. It seemed to be permanently by his side, and Iwaizumi was growing used to its chattering presence every time he regained a little consciousness. It was nice to focus on something other than the pain to prevent himself from going crazy. If he ever woke up from his coma – he was certain it was a coma – he had to thank the person for saving (and preserving) his life.

Three – the thing that happened so gradually that he almost missed it – he was regaining control over his body. He thought he saw an orange glow some days, and on others, he could twitch his fingers. Sometimes he thought he could predict when the damp cloths were going to be placed on him, and felt the weightlessness as his body was lifted. Iwaizumi knew he was healing bit by bit, but the more aware of it he became, the more anxious he was to be up and moving. Horizontal was definitely not his favourite body alignment. That said, it was exhilarating to be regaining control over himself again, and though he had a ways to go, Iwaizumi waited in gleeful anticipation for the day that he woke up.

x.x.x.x.x

Iwaizumi swam back into consciousness, groaning at the light painting the back of his closed eyelids red. He tried to lift his hands to cover his face, but his arms would not move. He groaned again when it occurred to him that he had been in a coma for a while, and of course he wouldn't be able to move, his muscles were too weak. Still, that light was entirely too bright. Why would anyone allow him to be placed in the sun? He was sure he wasn't before, so what had changed?

Iwaizumi tried to open his eyes, squinting against the brightness. He was not surprised when rays of light seared his eyes, but he still cursed to himself as he shut them tightly, shaking his head a little. (It did not occur to him that he could see for the first time in a long while, or that he could open his eyes.)

To his delight, he thought he felt his head move, and heard the sound of rustling leaves. No, wait… It had to be his hair against the sheets. Yes, that made more sense.

(Speaking of things that didn't make sense, he probably had to rectify his mind-set that there was no life on other planets. Evidently, there was more life in space than he had originally assumed, or else he would have been dead.)

Feeling a lot more alert than he had in forever and a half, Iwaizumi tried to move his fingers next, but they were stiff and unyielding. His arms felt like blocks of wood, and he couldn't move them at all. Sighing, he tried to wiggle his toes, but even those felt unwieldy, like they were buried in sand. It was very odd indeed.

Suddenly, he sensed something sitting on his arm stir. It wasn't exactly a heavy weight, but he wondered why there was something alive on him at all. A few moments later, he heard soft mewing, and a sound like a yawn. Ah, so they put a therapy cat with him, but it fell asleep on his arm.

Hold on.

Did they have cats on other planets?

More memories trickled into Iwaizumi's mind, fragmented bits of the crash, of burning, and of lying paralysed and healing. None of them added up to where he was, or how he had survived on an alien planet without oxygen. It was distinctively worrying, but he rationalised that if he was still alive, then there was probably enough oxygen for him to survive on.

...then again, the air he was breathing tasted smoky and chemical-laced, not unlike the smog back on Earth. Surely such polluted air had a lower oxygen ratio? The air was unusually warm and thick as well, as if he was in the heat of summer. Weird.

He was broken out of his reverie by the feeling of something walking along his arm, and a sleepy sound of the 'cat' stretching. He heard it mew softly, but this time, he thought he heard whispered words as well.

"Shouyou. Wake up."

Soft peeps that sounded like a baby bird answered, and again, there was that feeling that he understood its words. "G'way, Kenma. Five more minutes."

Iwaizumi snorted against his better judgement. So even aliens liked sleeping in. Wait, wasn't that a bird and a cat?

A surprised mew reached his ears. "Shouyou, I think it's awake."

" _I'm_ not awake. Go away."

"Shouyou, you're blinding the alien."

Alien? Oh. That was him, wasn't it?

Sleepy chirps were heard, an undercurrent to someone's sleepy grumbling. "I'll dim my light." The searing light diminished until it disappeared, and Iwaizumi sighed in relief. "Happy now?"

"No." The cat deadpanned. "It's definitely awake, it just sighed. Do you want to get Oikawa or shall I get him?"

"Don't get him at all." The bird – Shouyou –sounded grumpy. "He'll scold me for blinding his precious alien."

"I _heard_ that, Chibi-chan."

Iwaizumi perked up. There it was! The chatty voice from his days of darkness. What did the cat – Kenma – say he was called? Oikawa?

A surprised peep was heard from Shouyou, and it squeaked, "G-g-g-good morning, Oikawa-san."

"It would be a better morning if you could get off my alien and stop blinding people in their sleep." The voice was dry, and Iwaizumi snorted in amusement.

Shouyou started grumbling again. "Yes, Grand King."

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

Iwaizumi thought he heard Kenma huff in exasperation. "We'll return now. Do you need Suga? "

"Yes, thank you, Ken-chan. Tell him we're coming over. I'll take it from here."

Soft fluttering and a gentle thump told him that the bird and cat had jumped off, and Iwaizumi almost smiled at the retreat of the first aliens he had met. They seemed nice, if a little immature.

Soft footfalls approached him, and a hand was laid on his side. "Good morning, Alien-kun. Can you open your eyes?"

Now that there wasn't a blinding light in his face – what a weird bird Shouyou was, what sort of bird gave off light? – Iwaizumi could peel his eyes open. He blinked several times, trying to clear his vision, and the shapes that subsequently swam into view were rather disconcerting.

There were mountains of trash surrounding him, almost like he was sitting in the middle of a garbage heap. (He had visited a landfill before, but it was nothing compared to what he currently saw.) The sky was black with smoke, and what little colour he could see through the grey clouds was red. The ground immediately around him was barren and clear, though he thought he spotted a splotch of green off to his left. The thought that there were trees on other planets was heartening.

"Hey, I'm down here, you know." The chatty voice was warm and teasing, and Iwaizumi looked down in puzzlement. Shock ran through him, and if he wasn't already rooted to the ground, he would have fallen over.

He wasn't in a bed at all. He was standing upright, looking down on a humanoid figure slimmer than he was.

...of course the alien was slimmer than he was. He was a tree.

A tree!

How did that happen?

Pattering hands against his trunk forced him refocus his attention, and he realised his breaths were coming a little too quickly. Could trees hyperventilate?

The alien smiled up at him, its features remarkably human. "Don't panic, okay? I know it seems weird that you're a tree, but you _can_ change back to human form." The alien's face suddenly morphed into one of shock. "Wait a minute, all this time you were asleep and I never even wondered if you could understand me. Oh shit, oh shit! _Can_ you understand me?!"

Iwaizumi tried to nod, and the rustling of leaves rewarded him. Oh god, he _was_ the tree. Those were his leaves shaking.

The alien patted his trunk, and Iwaizumi couldn't figure out if the gesture was meant to reassure him or the other. "I understand, don't shake your crown like that. You'll lose leaves. Here, I'll walk you through the process of shifting back. Close your eyes, it might be easier."

Iwaizumi shut his eyes immediately and walled off the image of himself as a tree. He focused instead on the alien's voice, which had taken on a soothing tone.

"Feel how stiff your body is, and how deeply rooted to the ground you are? I want you to let that go. Think of being flexible and limp, feel yourself relaxing, your arms drooping, your toes able to move on their own. Ooh, you're doing well! Remember what it's like to be human, what it's like to have two arms and two legs and lots of bendable joints. Visualise your human body and how it feels to move comfortably in it. Imagine about stretching out your stiff muscles, the feel of your bones popping from standing still too long. How do you feel?"

"Better." Iwaizumi was so surprised at the sound of his voice – which was unsurprisingly croaky and hoarse – that his eyes shot open. He looked up at the alien in shock, then down at himself.

At his fully human body.

(He was wearing some sort of ripped shorts and a thin T-shirt, but he supposed that was better than not wearing anything at all.)

Iwaizumi felt a wave of relief wash over him as he took in his appearance. He clenched and unclenched his fists and wiggled his toes, feeling the same stiffness in his muscles as when he woke up the morning after a strenuous exercise routine. Stretching his arms out above him, he relished the pull of his muscles and heaved a great sigh of relief. He felt grimy, like there were layers of dirt piled on him, but the feel of the soil under his bare feet was strangely comforting. (Holes in the ground around him showed where a tree's roots once clung to the earth. He tried _very_ hard not to think about that.)

A hand clapped his shoulder and he looked up at the alien again, eyes finally taking in the foreign entity.

His second close-up look at the alien revealed that they were very similar, with the same sort of face and body shape. _The same humanness,_ he thought. This alien had hazelnut brown hair and eyes, with a face as pretty as a model's. It was tall and lanky, with lean muscles that probably came from playing sports or doing light work. It was also trying to speak to him, now that he was watching its mouth move.

"Sorry, what?"

The alien huffed and pouted. "I said, since we _can_ understand each other, we should introduce ourselves, right?"

"Uh, right." Iwaizumi cleared his throat nervously. "I'm Iwaizumi Hajime, an astronaut from Earth. Thank you for saving my life, and for taking care of me." He bent into a deep bow.

"I'm Oikawa Tooru, resident of Sampah, and the leader of Aoba Jousai. It's nice to meet you." Iwaizumi looked up to see Oikawa bow as well, albeit not as deeply. Then he straightened up and gave him a cheeky grin. "So, Iwa-chan, your planet's called Earth?"

"Yeah. Wait, what's with the familiar nickname?" Iwaizumi crossed his arms and glared.

 _Is this really the same guy from my memories? He's kind of irritating. And impolite._

Oikawa shrugged. "I've been taking care of you for weeks. You're as familiar to me as one of my clan. Although," the brunet smirked, "I guess you _are_ technically one of my clan."

"Huh?" Iwaizumi frowned. "I'm an alien on your planet, why would I be one of your clan?"

 _This sounds suspiciously like the yakuza or something. What's up with this guy?_

"Well, you see–"

"Oi, Oikawa!"

Iwaizumi spun around, just in time to see a cluster of trees shrink down into human forms and start running towards them. He noticed that all of them wore awfully mismatched and tattered clothing, but didn't have time to process a conclusion before the two leading the pack slammed into Oikawa. They grabbed him by the shoulders and ruffled his hair, laughing wildly at his spluttering protests.

"Mattsun, Makki, get off–! Mmph!"

Oikawa was not doing a very good job of pushing them off him, and was soon tackled to the ground under their combined efforts. For some reason, the duo seemed intent on rubbing his face into the dirt, and it made Iwaizumi's guard go up. He watched them cautiously, wondering if he was expected to greet the aliens in a similar manner. He was so preoccupied that he jumped when someone touched his shoulder. A male with light brown hair smiled reassuringly at him, then nodded towards the squabbling trio.

"Oikawa-san is fine. That's how they always act. Just them." He added, as if noticing Iwaizumi's apprehension. "The rest of us are civilised. I'm Yahaba Shigeru. Welcome to Aoba Jousai."

"Iwaizumi Hajime." Iwaizumi bowed slightly to the other. He wondered off-handedly how rude he could be and still get away with it. The rules here evidently weren't the same as on Earth. "What is Aoba Jousai?"

Yahaba looked surprised, but a quick glance at the trio rolling on the ground changed his expression to one of understanding. "I suppose Oikawa-san didn't get to tell you. We are Aoba Jousai, one of the clans living in this area. This is our territory, which has the same name. There are other clans around, like Karasuno and Nekoma, but they live further from us."

"Ah." Iwaizumi said. "Are all of you...trees?"

Yahaba laughed. "Is that what you're worried about?" His smile withered a little when he saw Iwaizumi's face. "Well, maybe it's a bit confusing for someone who didn't grow up here..."

"More like disturbing."

"I suppose that's true. But I'll leave it to Oikawa-san to explain that, I'm not as good as he is at talking." A not-so-subtle side glance showed that the fight had concluded, leaving a dirt-covered Oikawa glaring at them. Yahaba shuffled away just as his leader approached.

Oikawa wore a chilly smile as he grabbed Iwaizumi by the elbow and steered him away. "Alright, all of you back to your duties. There'll be plenty of time to get to know Iwaizumi-kun tonight."

"Oh? Are we having a celebration?" The taller of the two who attacked Oikawa earlier smirked, and the other folded his arms while mimicking his expression.

"If Refreshing-kun says he's good to go, yes. Goodbye, y'all. We need to go."

Iwaizumi couldn't get a word in before he found himself dragged out of the circle and towards an inconspicuous wall of garbage. But by the time they entered the passageway behind it, he had regained his balance and managed to tug his arm out of Oikawa's grasp. He stood his ground and folded his arms, trying to muster an unimpressed look. "Where are we going?"

"To Karasuno." Oikawa was nonplussed at the interruption. "It's early right now, but if we're lucky we should get there before Refreshing-kun leaves. It's about five mountains away."

"I think I deserve an explanation." Iwaizumi refused to budge, though the thought of climbing five mountains of trash was staggering. "I just woke up on a foreign planet, found out I can turn into a tree, and met the rest of your clan. Actually, that doesn't even count, I only spoke to one person and you looked like you wanted to kill him. _What_ is going on?"

Oikawa sighed. "Look, Iwa-chan, I'll explain everything, alright? Just come with me first. We really do need to go to Karasuno. Refreshing-kun is a healer, and he was the one who took care of you while you were out. He's the only one who can tell if you are fit to be moving around."

"I seem to be walking just fine." _Some shoes would be nice, though._

"You know what I mean!" Oikawa pouted, reaching out to tug on Iwaizumi's folded arms. "Come on, I'll explain as we walk. But right now, you have to watch the path as we exit. Seijou's guarded by a maze and a lot of traps. I don't want you to trigger something if you return by yourself."

Iwaizumi unfolded his arms hesitantly as he digested that information. "I am supposed to walk through a place riddled with traps _without shoes_?"

"Shoes?" Oikawa looked positively clueless.

"You know, coverings for your feet? To protect them from getting cut by sharp objects?" Iwaizumi spoke slowly, in case the airhead didn't get it.

"Oh, _shoes_." Oikawa laughed. "Why would you want to wear those fancy monstrosities? Hardly anyone can walk in them!"

"Huh?" It was Iwaizumi's turn to be confused. "Shoes don't have to be fancy, they just need to have soles and a top to enclose your feet." Oikawa looked like he still didn't get it, so he tried, "What happened to the shoes I was wearing when I crashed?"

"Those things on your feet?" A look of understanding plastered itself onto the brunet's face. "They were burnt pretty badly, so we couldn't tell what they were."

Iwaizumi sighed. _Figures. My luck is terrible._ "Fine, what are shoes to you then?"

"Hmm." Oikawa walked a few steps into the maze, then pulled a piece of junk off the wall. "Something like this?"

Iwaizumi could only gape at it. _What the heck is that?!_

The 'shoe' was a hideous maroon colour with a long pointed toe that curled in on itself to form a giant spiral. Shiny gemstones of every shade encrusted its surface, interlaced with fluffy pom-poms, and decorated with bells sewn along its base. Its look was completed by a chunky heel dripping with decals. Iwaizumi wasn't sure if it was made that ugly to kill people on sight or not. Even if he had misjudged its appearance, that heel could probably break someone's toes with a tiny misstep.

Oikawa took in Iwaizumi's reaction. "Not what you were expecting, was it, Iwa-chan?"

"Definitely not." Iwaizumi grimaced. "Where I come from, shoes are a lot simpler. Take away all those baubles, that ridiculous toe thing and that stupid heel and you would have a very plain woman's slipper."

Oikawa shook his head as he placed the eyesore back in its spot. "That's hardly a shoe at all."

"You don't get to judge, you've never been to Earth." Iwaizumi told him firmly. "I think I'll stick with my bare feet, it's a lot safer. As I was going to say, I understand the need for security, but why do you need to guard your home so tightly?"

"Take a look around you, Iwa-chan." Oikawa started walking, checking over his shoulder every now and then to ensure Iwaizumi was following. "How many natural trees do you see? Shifters like us aren't counted."

 _So they call themselves Shifters._

Iwaizumi thought about it as he scrambled over a stuffed sofa. "None."

"Exactly. Our planet is about seventy percent trash, twenty percent water, and ten percent arable land. Most of us live in the landfill, while only the royalty and those who serve them live on good land. There's not a lot of oxygen around, or trees to produce more while filtering the air. Any tree or plant found must be surrendered to the royalty immediately."

"And everyone at Aoba Jousai is a tree." Iwaizumi nodded in understanding. "You need to protect yourselves from being kidnapped."

"Ding ding ding! Give the man a prize!" Iwaizumi had to resist the urge to grab a random piece of trash and throw it at Oikawa's head.

"But really," Oikawa's voice became serious, and Iwaizumi turned to look at him, "You're one of us now. Everyone in the Trash Heap looks out for each other, especially so for Aoba Jousai. Whatever you went through on that ship before you crashed on our planet doesn't matter. No matter what happens, we protect our own. You're safe here."

Iwaizumi stared at him for a long moment. "That was very romantic and all, but you've got dirt on your face."

Oikawa hurriedly swiped at his face with his hands, but only succeeded in smudging the dirt. "Gah! Way to ruin my moment, Iwa-chan!"

x.x.x.x.x

Oikawa wasn't lying about the distance to Karasuno. It seemed to take a very long time to get there on foot. (Or maybe his perception of distance and time had changed because he hadn't moved around much in several weeks.) Whatever it was, Iwaizumi was tired after just one hill of garbage.

At least Oikawa was as chatty as ever, and happily explained the workings of society on the planet to him. It was a welcome distraction from his burning muscles.

"Everyone on Sampah is some sort of Shifter. Our planet is super hot because of the garbage and pollution, but animals have higher body temperatures, so somehow, we all adapted by taking the form of an animal or plant that would help us survive it best. Or your Shifter form could just reflect your personality; it depends.

"The Nohebi are the rulers of our planet, the royalty, you might say. Their Shifter form is a snake. They are greedy, conniving bastards who do nothing but waste resources and take what they want at the expense of others. I am awfully biased, of course, but that doesn't make it any less true."

 _Right..._

"Oh, and they're the only ones who wear shoes as nice as the one you saw earlier."

"You call that nice?!"

"Well, it is sort of a pretty colour... And those gemstones..."

"Shut up. It's hideous. Continue about the palace-dwellers."

Some grumbling and muttered words of 'unappreciative' and 'poor taste' later, the brunet obliged.

"Also living with the royals are Shiratorizawa, the royal guard. They are white eagles, and are notoriously good at their job. They are fierce fighters and can spot trouble miles away. If you see a Shiratorizawa guard who calls himself Ushijima Wakatoshi, run and hide as fast as you can. He is their captain and main recruiter, and who knows how many times he has tried to pull me in already."

 _How many of Aoba Jousai wish he did? Okay, that's a mean thought, I'm sure Oikawa's a decent leader._

 _Who am I kidding, he's an idiot._

"There are more clans in the palace region that are loyal to neither us in the landfill nor the royals, but I'll introduce you when I have to. There are too many otherwise.

"One of the clans is a double agent for us; they live under the royals, but bring us insider information. It's through them that we can raid the palace for things like expensive medical items or better food to trade on the black market. They are called Fukurodani, and their Shifter form is an owl. They are messengers by nature, and when they aren't running errands for the Nohebi, they'll usually be in the Trash Heap with us. Their leader, Fuku-chan, helped in your rescue."

"Fuku-chan?" _What a weird name._

"Oops, sorry. Bokuto Koutarou." Oikawa giggled as he jogged up a clear stretch on the mountain.

"Bokuto-san is male as well?"

"Yup! Actually, of all of us clans in the Trash Heap, only Karasuno has females. The rest of us are sad, sad males, pining for the touch of a woman." Oikawa mock-swooned, earning himself a shove from Iwaizumi. "Rude, Iwa-chan!"

"Continue about the clans."

"Fine." Oikawa grumbled. "Nekoma is another close ally of ours, and they are cats. They are great at defence, and have a great strategist among them. I think you met him earlier today."

Iwaizumi thought about it. "Kenma?"

Oikawa clapped in glee. "Bingo! You know his name?"

"I overheard his conversation. That's all. What's his full name?"

"Bah, you're no fun. It's Kozume Kenma. Ken-chan has another talent, but I can't really explain it, so you can ask him yourself. Their leader is Kuroo Tetsurou, and he's another meanie."

"I think I like him already."

"Mean!" Oikawa stuck his tongue out. "Right, then we have Karasuno, who are crows. They're good at a lot of things, 'cause each of them has their own talent. A lot like a murder of crows, really. You met Chibi-chan today too, he's the tiny crow that glows like the sun."

"Oh _him_." Iwaizumi groaned at the memory. "What a way to wake up."

"I know right?! I keep telling Sawamura – that's Karasuno's leader – that he has to teach Chibi-chan how to control his light, but that fluffball never learns!"

"Maybe he'll get it soon." Iwaizumi said unconvincingly. "Anyone else I should know about?"

"Just one more. Us! Aoba Jousai!" Oikawa grinned. "As you already know, we are trees, but our abilities are special.

"The main reason why the Nohebi want us so much is because we filter the air like natural trees; we take in the polluted air and breathe out oxygen. The pollutants are secreted with your sweat, which is why you might feel pretty disgusting."

Iwaizumi was stuck on the first part of his explanation. "We exhale oxygen?"

"Yup! Cool, right? Turns out it's pretty useful for medical emergencies, when we don't have oxygen tanks on hand. You can thank me now, Iwa-chan."

"For what?"

"For giving you oxygen for weeks until you adapted to our atmosphere?"

"Oh. Right. Thanks."

"You could sound happier about it!" Oikawa pouted, but straightened up almost immediately. "Oh, we're here."

They walked through a well-concealed entrance, stepping out into the open space of Karasuno's compound. An orange blur ran past them, froze for a millisecond, then sped away, shrieking at the top of its lungs, "The Grand King is here!"

Oikawa scowled. "I told him not to call me that."

"Why not? It sounds cool."

"Iwa-chan, that's so sweet of you! Oww!"

Iwaizumi shook his hand, knuckles smarting where he had hit Oikawa. Damn, the guy had tough skin. "I suppose that's the crow that blinded me this morning. Why does he call you 'Grand King'?"

"Maybe because Ushijima always tries to recruit me into the palace? I've no idea, but it's irritating."

"Hmm."

They walked round the perimeter of Karasuno, with Oikawa pointing out the different tents and the people who lived inside them. "Sawamura Daichi, leader of Karasuno. He shares it with Refreshing-kun – ah, sorry, Sugawara Koushi – their healer. Tsukishima Kei and Yamaguchi Tadashi. Apprentice healers. Tsukishima has another skill, but it's a bit difficult to explain without Chibi-chan around. Ah, there's Chibi-chan. Hinata Shouyou, resident ball of endless energy. Nishinoya Yuu and Tanaka Ryuunosuke. They're great attackers and scavengers. I think they're on watch at Aoba Jousai tonight, you can meet them then."

"Watch?"

"We need to be defended, remember? As trees, we have tougher skin because of our bark, but we're not very fast. Each clan sends a few representatives to keep watch over us at night, and sleep in our branches. Oxygen in exchange for protection."

"That's why Hinata-kun and Kozume-kun were with me this morning." Iwaizumi refused to touch the notion of someone sitting on him because he had been a tree.

"Yup! Although Chibi-chan wasn't supposed to _blind_ you."

 _Hoot, hoot._

Iwaizumi turned. _What was that–?_

The next moment, a grey-and-black blur barrelled into Oikawa, picking him clean off his feet and spinning him around. "Hey hey hey! Tooru!"

Oikawa was flailing, trying in vain to get down. It was quite an amusing sight, seeing him thrown over the shoulder of a shorter man like a sack of potatoes. "Fuku-chan! Put me down!"

 _Fuku-chan? Ah, Bokuto Koutarou._

 _Is it bad if I approve of this manhandling?_

Bokuto hooted gleefully. "No way! Is that how you greet your friends?"

"I'm trying to take Iwa-chan to Refreshing-kun! Lemme down!"

"Iwa-chan?" Bokuto stopped spinning and made eye contact with Iwaizumi. He cocked his head to one side, a predatory grin spreading across his face. His arms dropped to his sides, and Oikawa fell to the ground with a loud "Oomph".

"Ohoho?" Bokuto walked up to Iwaizumi, sticking his face uncomfortably close to his own. "Tooru's alien is finally awake, huh?"

Iwaizumi fixed his mouth into a hard line, refusing to back away. _Does 'personal space' not exist in his vocabulary?_ "Yes. I'm Iwaizumi Hajime. You are?"

Bokuto raised his eyebrows, pulling an impressed face. He opened his mouth to answer, but stumbled to the side as someone else tumbled into him, hooting noisily.

"Gotcha, birdbrain!" A tall man with ridiculous bedhead had one arm hooked around Bokuto's neck, while the other dug into his ribs.

"Kuroo!" Bokuto jabbed the other mercilessly, causing them to fall over and straight into an impromptu tickle war. Unfortunately for Oikawa, he had not gotten away fast enough, and was dragged shrieking into their duel.

 _Kuroo...Tetsurou?_

Iwaizumi lifted his eyes from the fighting trio and was met by the sight of two unfamiliar men also watching them. The darker haired one noticed his gaze and gingerly made his way around the ruffians (and the unlucky Oikawa) to speak to him. His companion trailed behind him, jumping away with a squeak when Kuroo's hand just missed his ankle.

The ravenhead bowed politely when he reached Iwaizumi. "Hello. You look better. I'm Akaashi Keiji. This is Kozume Kenma." The smaller man peeked at him from his spot behind Akaashi before quickly averting his eyes. "I'm Fukurodani's second-in-command. You can find me anytime you need to send a message, or if you need to subdue Bokuto-san. Kozume is Nekoma's mastermind. Kozume, say hello."

"Hello." Kenma mumbled to the ground. His bleached hair swung forward like a curtain, hiding most of his face. Akaashi sighed with exasperation and fondness.

"Iwaizumi Hajime. Thank you for the offer." Iwaizumi drew their attention back to him, then looked past Akaashi. "Nice to meet you, Kozume-kun."

Kenma looked up in surprise, then nodded quietly and shrank back behind Akaashi. Iwaizumi was confused for a moment before Akaashi stepped in. "Kozume isn't used to strangers. Please forgive him."

"Uh... Right." _I think I just found a child and his mother._

A hand clamped onto his ankle, and Iwaizumi looked down, prepared to kick off whatever it was. Instead of some alien lowlife, the thing at his feet was Oikawa, who wheezed dramatically and rolled onto his back. "They've killed me! I'm sorry Iwa-chan, you have to go on your own. Promise you won't forget me…"

Iwaizumi was unimpressed and showed it by kicking Oikawa in the side. "Get up and show me where we're supposed to go. Stop being such a drama queen."

"Mean, Iwa-chan! Help me up at least." Oikawa stretched up a hand, only to have it batted away. He pouted in mock-hurt. "Iwa-chaaaaannnn."

"No."

A soft sneeze off to his left made Iwaizumi look up, and he noticed Kenma trying to hide his smile. Across him, Bokuto and Kuroo had gotten to their feet and were smirking at them in sync. Only Akaashi remained stoic, although he looked rather long-suffering.

"Tooru, you'd better listen to Iwa-chan and get up, you know?" Bokuto sang. Kuroo continued teasingly, "Or you'd get hit again~ Bet you like it rough, or you wouldn't have taken that~"

Oikawa flushed red and shot to his feet, grabbing Iwaizumi by the hand and pulling him away. He ignored the catcalls and hoots following them, pinching his lips into a tight line. The silence suited Iwaizumi just fine, though he wondered why Oikawa reacted so violently.

Oikawa pulled the flap of one of the unnamed tents aside and ushered him in. To his credit, his voice was only the slightest bit tense when he spoke. "Suga-chan~ Are you still here?"

A grey head poked out from behind a bunch of curtains. "Morning, Oikawa." His eyes turned to Iwaizumi, widening with realisation. "Hello. You're finally awake."

Iwaizumi dropped into a bow. _This must be the healer._ "Thank you for taking care of me. My name is Iwaizumi Hajime."

"Sugawara Koushi, but I think you already knew that." Suga's voice was kind, and he ushered Iwaizumi to a chair in the corner. "Have a seat while I get my tools. I'll be back shortly."

Iwaizumi sat, and Oikawa took up his post by his shoulder, rambling on about something or the other. Iwaizumi forced himself to listen out of politeness, though he'd rather have not.

His attention was refocused to the tent entrance when a tall blond and a skittish looking guy walked in, followed by a short redhead. The trio took up positions around the room, and Oikawa's stream of words slowed when he saw who it was. In an instant, his eyes hardened, gleaming with danger, and his grin turned murderous.

"Chibi-chan, come here~"

The redhead's eyes grew large at the sight of him, and he shook his head violently before running behind a curtain. He stuck his head out so just his eyes were showing and squeaked, "No. Go away."

"Hinata, come introduce yourself to our guest at least." The dark-haired boy sighed. He put the vials and surgical instruments he carried down on a table and bowed to Iwaizumi. "I'm Yamaguchi Tadashi, and this is Tsukki!" He pointed to the blond behind him, who scowled at the name. "Nice to meet you. You're probably sick of introducing yourself, but what's your name?"

"Iwaizumi Hajime." Iwaizumi laughed. "You're right, I am sick of introducing myself. Any chance I can do it at once to everyone?"

"Well, if Suga-san says you can, we can have a meeting tonight with all the clans!"

"Yamaguchi, don't make decisions for other people." The blond deadpanned. "My name is Tsukishima Kei, not 'Tsukki'. Don't call me that."

"Right." Iwaizumi was amused by his attempt to act cool. "And what about your friend over there?"

The redhead squeaked when the attention returned to him. "Hinata Shouyou. But I'm not coming out till the Grand King leaves!"

Oikawa's murderous intent was almost visible as a black haze around him. He put on a false smile and said, "Don't worry, Chibi-chan, I won't kill you today~ Come out here, we just need to have a little _talk_ ~"

"Oi, don't bully people smaller than you." Iwaizumi punched Oikawa in the arm, and the latter whimpered.

"Mean, Iwa-chan!"

Snickers from various corners of the tent clearly didn't agree.

"Oikawa, isn't it your turn to go collecting today?" Suga re-entered the tent, and placed more vials on the table. "You can go find some clothes for Iwaizumi-san while you're out."

"Just 'Iwaizumi' is fine." Suga inclined his head to show that he'd heard.

"Yes, but he's my responsibility. I shouldn't leave." Oikawa wheedled.

"Iwaizumi is safe at Karasuno, you know that. Go, supervise your clan. You've been away for too long, they miss you."

"How do you know how my clan's feeling?" Oikawa grumbled, but started towards the door. "Fine. I'll see you guys at the gathering tonight."

"Oikawa, don't be a brat. Be polite to Iwaizumi, at least."

"Yeah, yeah!" Hinata booed from behind the curtain, the material muffling his words. Oikawa scowled in its direction, then turned back to Iwaizumi sulkily.

"Bye, Iwa-chan. You can stay with Karasuno for the day. I'll be back at sundown."

Iwaizumi raised his eyebrows. "What am I, a wife you're coming home to?" Tsukishima and Yamaguchi snickered loudly, and Oikawa burned bright red. "See you later, Trashykawa. Go attend to your clan. I'll be fine."

" _Our_ clan," Oikawa corrected, but he slipped out of the door before Iwaizumi could demand an explanation. (Or wonder why he didn't respond to the verbal jibe.)

Hinata peeked out from behind the curtain, and after ensuring that Oikawa was indeed gone, bounded out and approached Iwaizumi happily. "Hi! Sorry for blinding you this morning! I can't control my light that well in my sleep."

"Hinata!" Suga sounded scandalised. "You did what?"

The redhead peeped and shrank away. "Sorry, Suga-san. "

Tsukishima snickered. "How are you ever going to become Karasuno's best attacker if you can't control your ability?"

"Oi, Tsukishima!"

"Now, now. Quiet down, you two." Suga held his hands up in a placating gesture, but his face showed that he was ready to push the duo apart if circumstances called for it. "We have work to do. I need white light today, get ready."

Iwaizumi must have had on a confused face, because Suga laughed. "Did Oikawa tell you about our individual abilities?"

"Some of it. I'm still confused, to be honest."

"I don't doubt that. Come this way, it will be easier for me to do a check-up if you're lying down." Suga led him to a table that Yamaguchi had prepared, encouraging him to lie back and relax. As he did so, Tsukishima and Hinata positioned themselves just out of sight, while Yamaguchi stood by the bed.

"I'll give you a breakdown first, and explain it in more detail when we're done. The boys have their own tasks, so I won't hold them back any longer than necessary."

"My apologies for messing up your schedule."

Suga smiled easily. "It's no big deal. Complications keep us on our toes in case something unexpected occurs. If you really want to make it up to me, you can follow along when I go get more tinctures later."

Suga's hand hovered above Iwaizumi's forehead. "Before I begin, I need your consent. In order to check your body's condition, I need to be touching you. It will be a bit awkward if you're not used to it."

Iwaizumi tried to shrug. "Go ahead."

Suga nodded. "Tsukishima, light please."

A harsh white light washed over them, and Iwaizumi blinked rapidly, trying to adjust to the sudden brightness. Suga quickly apologised. "A little dimmer, please."

The light dimmed, and Suga pressed his hand to Iwaizumi's forehead. A warm tingling spread out from his hand, and Iwaizumi began to feel drowsy. He had to rouse himself when Suga began speaking.

"I'll keep this short, because I need to concentrate, and you'll probably be asleep in a while.

"On Sampah, everyone is a Shifter, but individuals have their own skills and abilities. For example, my skill is healing, and I can see the infected or diseased portions of a person when I touch them. Sometimes I am able to induce healing as well, when the infection is mild. Another few notable abilities that are useful for healing are Hinata's and Tsukishima's. Hinata gives off a natural orange light, like sunlight. I'm sure you've noticed that it is also very bright. Tsukishima's ability is to reflect that light and change its colour to anything between white or yellow. The reflected light is also considerably dimmer, which is useful for less intense healings."

"You need light to heal people?" Iwaizumi's words were slightly slurred as he fought off a haze of sleep.

"No, no, not like that. I need light to see when I'm performing a healing. In a severe or desperate situation, I need a brighter light to make sure I didn't miss anything. In a less intense case, a dimmer light is fine."

"Mm okay."

Suga laughed softly and Yamaguchi giggled. "Just sleep. I'll wake you up after I'm done with my examination. But perhaps you want to know the ability of one more person before you sleep?"

"Who's that?"

"Oikawa." Suga laughed again when Iwaizumi perked up, and brushed his hand across his forehead to ensure he stayed sleepy.

"Oikawa's a little unique. If you've noticed, he is very in tune with everyone, and gets along well even with those not in his clan. He acts like an idiot most of the time, but that's just to protect himself."

"Protect himself from what?"

Iwaizumi thought he heard a melancholic note in Suga's voice right before sleep claimed him. "Everyone. People in general are quite dangerous for someone like him. You see, Oikawa's ability is reading other people's emotions.

"And sometimes, those emotions can change him into a different person."


End file.
